Week of Silence

In an attempt to humble ourselves and focus on the task at hand...WINNING that is!

I have stopped the arrogance and cockiness of Bloggin for the past week.

We wanted our actions to speak for our words.

But, Don't worry! After Chalkin the Walk yesterday, The BLACK TEAM is back to our ridiculous shenanigans. Just doing incredible alcoholic thangs with our lives. Keep an eye out for more to come...more soon friends.

BLACKOUT!

ROKKKKKKK STARS

Gettin' our rocks off

Black Team has just been killin' it for what seems like centuries now.

I have a super crazy busy Humpday. Can't wait to be at the STRETCH tonight. Probably going to miss the challenge tonight. It sucks I know. But I'll see y'all late night!

Blackout

A Black Magic Woman: Becky Brinkman

For everyone who thinks: "Oh Spons is just taking this way too far. He's making his team care way too much about a some stupid excuse to get drunk."

2 Things:
1) It's Mr. Spons to you.

2) Here is a little something from one of TEAM BLACKOUT'S finest, B.Brink:

As "Don't Stop Believin'" rolls on the jukebox... I just want to give a J. Wilson-esque roar out (more mighty than a shout out). I woke up today with a head heavy with snot, a nose and ears that were rapidly swelling shut, a voice coarse and about half an octave lower than usual, and a baby factory that was in... shall we say... fine monthly form. I dragged myself out of bed to go the health center to _get a shot_ (not the good kind) and trudge back home. Body successfully injected with tuberculosis, I took my first of 3 naps, _went to class_, came home and took my second and third naps. Yes, I could have waited for the pain to pass over me and called it a night around nap 2. But DO YOU SEE TIRE TRACKS ON MY FOREHEAD? NO. I HAVE NOT BEEN HIT BY A BUS. SO I 50 DAY-ON.
Now I'm just downing plain orange juice like a boss until I've racked up $5's worth and/or until Kyle buys me a shot (the good kind) of whiskey to put me out of my misery. I'm not brave enough to do it myself.
New song: "Arms Wide Open" with oppressively loud bass. *grimace* Black out or back out.


 Just brings a fucking tear to my eye. It's like watching your child take their first steps or having Momma put your report card up on the fridge... I'm just so goddam proud right now. 


Black Out, Bitches

A Birthday on the Rocks

Ya it is a little dark. Problem? Next Time You Should Be There!

Today was a historic day. On this sacred day the world was given a gift, the gift of life. The 18th of April marks the anniversary of Joanne The Brave. Now she'd kill me for saying it, but Thirty-One days ago today, our beloved leader was brought into this world. Ever since that special spring day, Joanne has brought love, friendship, and spirits into the lives of so many. So, on this day, the 18th day of the 4th month, we give thanks for our head-hancho. Happy Birthday Joanne.

So what do you think the Black team did to celebrate? Did they make a cute sign out of dead horses and sparkles?

 Fuck NO! We made our signs. That shit was day one. 30 days in...I think we can be more creative.

We took one of Ohio Wesleyan's most sacred traditions, a right of passage, shared by committed members who unify themselves for a cause. This creates a bond so strong that the only conceivable way to express the happiness is to PAIN IT for the world to see!

Tri-Gamma? lame. Alpha Phi Delta? no thanks. TEAM BLACKOUT? Yes please.

We went Picasso all up on OWU's FACE.

The proof is in the pudding. Eat it up, Bitches!

CAUTION WET PAINT

The Black Hole is spreading. Watch yo back!

BLACK OUT!

SUNDAY FUNDAY

Team BLACKOUT

Easy Like Sunday Morinin'.

What are you doing? Cuzzzz we're Just chillin at the Stretch, drinkin free beer, eatin an original Joanne recipe, takin my pants off in public....No big deal. Get on our LEVEL!

The sun is out, beer is cold, music is loud, and the blackies are holdin it down.

Blackout

The Black Hole

Check out our Slide Show Here:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vee0GJdz4ZE

To all the nay sayers: "It's 5 days late." "The pictures are flipped the wrong way." "There isn't one for every hour." "You're nose is huge." "It's not even on your Blog."

Seriously? Give me a break. 

Computers are hard.

In the words of Arthur Herbert Fonzarelli: "SIT ON IT!"

Because that's exactly what we did. We took that booth and made it our own, we made it our HOLE. We sat the crap out of that booth. For three freaking days, monkeyflickers! And just wait, the hole is just getting deeper and darker!

So, Take some advice from The Fonz head on down to the Stretch check out THE BLACK HOLE and  and "SIT ON IT!"

Black, out.

Get it Poppin'

"Ay, yo, BLACKOUT"

Yeah, It's kind of like that. After we stomped the competition on Wednesday, TEAM BLACK OUT finds itself sitting atop the leader board with 295 POINTS, BITCHES!!!

Wednesday marked the halfway point of the 50 step program to greatness. While we sit on the comfy throne of first place today, we must keep up the dedication. As completely absentminded and boneheaded as the rednecks, purps, and gree-grees are, they'll learn from their mistake. What doesn't kill you only makes you stronger.

I've been hearing that they got some tricks up their sleeves. Well TEAM BLACKOUT knows some fucking tricks too. What doesn't kill us only makes us DRUNKER! 

We're the Black Team. When that last Red Balloon popped under the righteous boot of Hannah Berger-Butler-Blacker,  as nearly all THE BLACK TEAM remained on the battlefield, balloons unscathed, we rejoiced! Since no one could burst our balloons, we did it ourselves. Up and down, we jumped. POP POP POP POPOPOPOPOPO BOOOOOOM! The sounds rang out for all to hear on the warm Ohio evening. You could feel the momentum swing toward the Black Team. Delaware shook. The Earth trembled. I'm worried we might of caused some sort of seismic disturbance or a tidal wave in Australia (shout out to my 2 aussie readers! Whoever you are).

The Black Hole is only the beginning. With this victory, the Hole is just getting bigger. Watch your step, Ya might fall in.

BLACK OUT

HumpDay

Sorry for the radio silence, bitches. SO much to do, so little time. But, the Blog shouldn't suffer because of it. That's my bad. Here's a little something until I get more than 15 minutes to myself.

In case this Blog is your only source of News, since the last time we talked

-We F-ing did it! Black Team completed the BLACK HOLE and that booth will be ours FOREVER....Or til next year when someone does it longer....

-Wrote a 20 page paper on for my Seminar in Native American Women's Literature and completed my second portfolio

-bought a bottle of chocolate wine

-drank all the captain morgan at The Stretch and the best beer EVER!

All work is original designs of Joanne copyright The Stretch.

It's HumpDay so, we got a challenge tonight. Probably just throw down Black Team style. See ya in first place. Stay Sober.....for now!

Black, Out!

-

DUI

Not a laughing matter guys. Last night, I was intoxicated---legally I would like to add. During my inebriated state, I unfortunately did something very terrible, something I am disgusted by. It will be with me for as long as I live, on my record. Last night, presumably between the hours of 11:30 and 2:00, I had my first DUI of the semester: Dining Under the Influence.

Due to the $1.75 Captain and Cokes yours truly was drinking during the entirety of Happy Hour, I was inappropriately drunk by 7:00. I did some things that I'm not proud of. But worst of all is the DUI. When I woke up this morning I saw it. Crumpled amongst my dirty clothes and loose papers sat the remains of a drive-thru McDonald's bag. YUCK!

For those of you who don't know, I hate fast food. I rarely eat sweets, cookies, or ice cream. I'm embarrassed by this. Sometimes, I'll even lie and tell people I have an allergy. I'm not a "health freak". I just feel like shit after eating those kinds of things. I know it's going to taste great and the 11 seconds it will spend in my mouth are going to be awesome, but after that it's PTSD: Post-Traumatic Stomach Disorder.

I'd like to take the time now to apologize to some people. To my fellow Black Teammates, I have let you down, I'm sorry I cannot hold myself to a higher standard, I have failed you as a role model. To whoever drove me to McDonald's, I'm sorry I don't remember. To Ronald McDonald, go fuck yourself you piece of shit clown. To my parents, stop calling me all the time, I'm fine. To LeBron James, go fuck yourself you piece of shit clown. . . . These aren't really apologies anymore. But, It's 9:42 A.M. on a Saturday and I'm at the bar literally by myself so deal with it.


Black Out

BLACK HOLE

Day 2. If you don't know. There's a reason! BLACK OUT!

From The Desk Of A Legend

Obviously, I tried to get in touch with J.Wilson (Read all about it HERE). Unfortunately, he was being harassed endlessly by Dos Equis to be the new "Most Interesting Man in the World". But, the light-weights iand their Mexican Beers couldn't hold a candle to to TEAM BLACK OUT. So, J. shotgunned a beer in the CEO's face and promptly responded to my E-mail. OMG! OMG! OMG! Check it out Blackies!

Chris,

I'd like to commend you and Team Black Out on your valiant effort. I've been called a lot of things, but never a "true inspiration" or "fucking champion," and I thank you for the additions to my resume. Let me take a moment to wish the drinkingest best to your brothers in tankards. As am I, you are in the midst of a marathon, not a hundred yard dash. Pace yourselves, put in the work and do not allow another team to usurp your glory. You deserve it, you are the Black, and I've got your back. You signed up for this simple challenge; this oath may as well have been written in blood. Let no small task, obligation, or excuse stand in your way. This cup of victory belongs to each of you. Do not let your team down. There will be no greater disgrace as long as you live. After your victory dance, with goblets aloft, consider your future. Make it the best you can for your family and your country. Live a life of good works, balanced and noble. Take quality over quantity at every turn, whether spouse or beer. Live well, you beer-soaked brothers of mine, you fucking champions!

Peace and Pints!

J.

God Amongst Men?

Is this the face of hope? Is this the inspiration we need? Role model may not be enough to express my respect for J. Wilson.

As I find myself and my teammates in the midst of our own 50 journey, our quest. I am emboldened by the actions of others. While we pledge our stomaches to the liquor and beer, we find solace in one man who shares our passion. That man is J. Wilson.

For 46 days, J. WIlson will consume only beer and water. "An ideal condition of harmony, beer and joy." Much like the Bvarian monks of yesteryear, Wilson has been pounding beer every single day during Lent. 


Dude isn't eating any food. This fucking champion has alcohol flowing through his veins!


The hunger stopped during the first week, Wilson said, and he has no designs to break his fast.


Not only does this dude chug brews like THE BLACK TEAM, he has the heart of a Blackie! "No question, I'd have to get hit by a bus to stop." From here on out J. Wilson said it would be, "just an exercise in discipline."


You hear that? HIT BY A BUS!  For all the people: 'waaaaah I have an exam, I can't go to the stretch' 'boooohoooo my tummy hurts from all the jager bombs' Ask yourselves: WWJWD What Would J. Wilson Do? And the answer is, inevitably, DRINK BEER!


 Discipline. Honor. Beer. Does it sound like the 50 Day Club? Yeah, I think so.


Check out J.Wilson's Blog. Might be the only dude on the internet cooler than me....or as cool at least:
http://brewvana.wordpress.com/

The Black Hole

Operation Black Hole is underway. Hide your kids.

Pre-Game

Just dropped by the registrar, added my 6th class. It's a second module only one. It meets 6 days a week at The Stretch. So, I've just been doing my homework. So, what if I haven't slept in 3 days? Who needs sleep when you've learned how to skillfully launch your shoes onto a table from 9 feet away?

Gotta get ready for tonight's exam! BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT!

Day 13-ish: Woah.

Blog is having a hard time keeping up with the Black Team. We are going hard guys. But this picture says 1000 words I cannot describe, yet I feel. Enjoy the day off. Back to work on Monday!